Clarence

About the show

A great deal of the dialogue centers on Clarence's mysterious background, which comes out bit by bit. Even his surname isn't known until late in the play. Act I (The anteroom of Mr. Wheeler's private office, New York.) Mrs. Martyn suggests Mr. Wheeler might want to see a young soldier in the waiting room. At first Mr. Wheeler demurs, but as his wife, son, daughter, and daughter's governess parade through the waiting room baying out their complaints, he realizes it might be politic to offer the young doughboy a job to keep him quiet. Mr. Wheeler is impressed that Clarence could drive mules in the Army without learning to swear, thinking this may be the fellow to ride herd on his family. Mrs. Martyn, unable to hear Clarence through Cora's chattering, has recorded his surname as "Smun". All that the family knows about the plainly ailing Clarence is that he was discharged for his liver. (Curtain) Act II (Living room of Mr. Wheeler's home, Englewood, New Jersey. Daytime, three weeks later) Clarence now acts as general handyman at the Wheeler home, as well as secretary to Mr. Wheeler, since he is plainly well educated. He has grown healthier and stands straight, but still wears his uniform for lack of civilian clothes. Della and Rosie admire his husband potential, while Dinwiddie can't decide whether Clarence is domestic staff or a professional man. Violet is beset with suitors: first Bobby, then Hubert Stem, and now Clarence who shyly seeks her company. Cora is distraught when she learns Hubert was using her as a stalking horse to draw the protective Violet to him. Clarence frustrates Hubert's attempt to woo Violet then calms Mrs. Wheeler's unwarranted jealousy over Mr. Wheeler and Violet. But Violet doesn't want Clarence to pursue her, and requests he keep his distance. Della has now abandoned her designs on Bobby and switched to Clarence, as does Cora. When Clarence's army backpay arrives, he buys a new suit and used saxophone, and leads Cora and Dinwiddie into an impromptu parade. (Curtain) Act III (Same, that evening.) Della spars with a jealous Dinwiddie, then startles Bobby by comparing him unfavorably to Clarence. She reveals Clarence used to work in a "lavatory". Violet still refuses Clarence's tenative approaches, but is reconciled with Mrs. Wheeler. Cora asks Clarence what was wrong with his liver, to which he replies he was shot in it. "At Château-Thierry?" asks Mrs. Wheeler, to which he answers "During training". Violet, Bobby, and Mr. Wheeler cannot agree on Clarence's last name, offering Moon, Smart, and Smun respectively. Hubert Stem now brings a newspaper clipping about an Army deserter named "Charles Short". Clarence frustrates him by obtuseness, but reacts angrily when accused of being Charles Short. Mr. Wheeler tries to calm him, explaining they know so little about him. Clarence shouts that all you have to do is look him up in Who's Who, as he is the expert on Coleoptera. The situation is defused when Dinwiddie reports a plumbing emergency. Clarence exits to stop the flooding while Mr. Wheeler calls for a dictionary. (Curtain) Act IV (Same, the next morning.) The Wheeler family bickers after breakfast, Bobby and Cora endlessly sniping and aggravating Mr. Wheeler. Only Mrs. Wheeler remains calm. The crux of the matter is they can't remember the word Clarence told them. They also can't find a Clarence in Who's Who under any of the surnames they thought were his. Clarence explains to Della that he worked in a laboratory, not a lavatory, but she doesn't know the difference. Violet comes down with her suitcase and hat. She is leaving, but is surprised when Clarence says he is too. While they are alone Clarence explains that he is an entomologist, and has re-applied for his old job. He expects a letter that morning confirming the re-appointment. He overwhelms Violet with his confidence in planning their future; she is swept along in the tide. The letter arrives for C. Smith, Esq., provoking astonishment among everyone. The Who's Who is re-consulted and reveals his doctorate and other impressive credentials. Violet and Clarence depart, while the miffed Cora, frustrated in love again, swallows and says softly "Oh, Clarence". (Curtain)