Anything Goes
Music and Lyrics · Musical · 1934
Five versions of the libretto of Anything Goes exist: the original 1934 libretto, the 1962 off-Broadway revival libretto, the 1987 revival libretto, the 2011 revival libretto, and the 2022 revised libretto. The story has been revised, though all involve similar romantic complications aboard the SS American and feature the same major characters. The score has been altered, with some songs cut and others reassigned to different scenes and characters, and augmented with various Porter songs from other shows. Billy Crocker, a young Wall Street broker, has fallen in love with a beautiful girl he met at a party and spent the evening with in a taxi. His boss, Elisha J. Whitney, is preparing to make a business deal and is going to travel to London aboard the SS American. Evangelist-turned-nightclub singer Reno Sweeney will be traveling aboard the same ship. Billy sees Reno as a friend, but she obviously has feelings for him ("I Get a Kick Out of You"). Billy goes to the dock to say farewell to his boss and Reno ("Bon Voyage"), and glimpses the mysterious girl again. He learns that she is the heiress Hope Harcourt and, escorted by her mother Mrs. Harcourt, is on her way to England with her fiancé Lord Evelyn Oakleigh, a handsome but stuffy and hapless British nobleman. Billy stows away on the ship with a plan of winning Hope's heart. "Moonface" Martin, a second-rate gangster labeled "Public Enemy 13", and his girlfriend, Bonnie, have disguised themselves as a minister and a missionary and, innocently aided by Billy, board the ship under their assumed identities, stranding the ship's real chaplain back at the port. Moonface and Bonnie mistakenly leave behind their leader, "Snake Eyes" Johnson, Public Enemy 1. To thank him, Bonnie and Moonface let Billy have Snake Eyes Johnson's passport and ticket without telling him to whom they belong. Billy cons Evelyn into leaving him alone with Hope, by convincing him he is very ill. When he goes to get some air, Billy and Hope meet again, and it turns out she has been unable to stop thinking about him as well ("All Through the Night"). Though Hope prefers Billy, she insists she must marry Evelyn. Unbeknownst to Billy, her family's company is in financial trouble and a marriage to Evelyn would promote a merger and save it. The ship's crew gets a cable from New York saying that Public Enemy 1 is on board. Moonface admits his true identity to Billy and he and Bonnie conspire to disguise Billy as a crew member since he is now presumed to be Snake Eyes Johnson. A quartet of lovelorn sailors comfort themselves with the thought of romance when they reach shore ("There'll Always Be a Lady Fair"). On deck, Bonnie lures the sailors to her ("Where Are the Men?"), then steals the clothes of one of the men for Billy. Hope discusses her impending marriage with Evelyn and discovers that he is not particularly pleased with the engagement either. Billy asks Reno to help separate Evelyn and Hope, and she agrees. Billy and Reno reaffirm their friendship ("It's Friendship"). Reno tries to charm Evelyn; she succeeds and he invites her for a drink in his cabin. She and Moon plot that Moon should burst into the cabin and discover Reno half-naked in Evelyn's arms, providing sufficient reason for breaking off the engagement. However, when Moon breaks into the room, machine gun in tow, he instead sees Reno fully dressed and Evelyn nearly undressed. Moon tries to invent some indecent explanation for the situation, but Evelyn insists that he would be quite pleased by any rumor depicting him as a passionate lover, especially if Hope heard it. Moon admits that the plot has failed. The crew discover that Billy is not a sailor, and Moon and Reno create a new disguise for him from a stolen pair of trousers, a jacket taken from a drunken passenger, and hair cut from Mrs. Harcourt's Pomeranian and made into a beard. Reno tells Billy that Evelyn has kissed her, and she is sure she will be Lady Oakleigh soon, since love moves so quickly these days ("Anything Goes"). Mrs. Harcourt, recognizing her dog's hair, angrily pulls off Billy's beard and the crew and passengers realize he must be the wanted man. As Snake Eyes Johnson, Billy is an instant celebrity. Billy is honored by both crew and passengers as "Public Enemy Number One". He tells the Captain that Moon (who is still disguised as a minister) is helping him reform from his wicked ways. Moon is asked to lead a revival in the ship's lounge. The passengers confess their sins to the "Reverend", and Lord Evelyn admits to a one-night stand with a young Chinese woman, Plum Blossom. Hope is not impressed with Billy's charade, and to please her, he confesses to everyone that he is not really Snake Eyes Johnson. Moon attempts to compensate by revealing that he is not a minister; he is Public Enemy Number Thirteen. The captain sends them both to the brig. Reno restores the mood of the Revival ("Blow, Gabriel Blow"). Moon tries to cheer Billy up ("Be Like the Bluebird"). Billy doubts he will ever see Hope again; he and Moon cannot leave their cell until they return to America. Their card-playing Chinese cellmates Ching and Ling, imprisoned for conning all the third class passengers out of their money, will be put ashore in England. Moon and Billy challenge them to a game of strip poker, win their clothes, and disguise themselves again. Billy, Moon, and Reno show up at the Oakleigh estate in Chinese garb. Billy and Moon tell Oakleigh's uncle that they are the parents of "Plum Blossom" and threaten to publicize Evelyn's indiscretion if he does not marry her. Oakleigh offers to buy them off and Moon gleefully accepts the cash, much to Billy and Reno's chagrin. Billy and Reno find Hope and Evelyn, who are both unhappy with the prospect of their matrimony. Hope declares that she desperately wants to marry Billy ("The Gypsy in Me"). Billy spots Whitney and finally learns that Evelyn and Hope's planned marriage is really an awkward business merger. Billy realises that Oakleigh is manipulating them all; Hope's company is really worth millions and Billy informs Whitney of that fact. Whitney offers to buy the firm from Hope at an exorbitant price, and she accepts. The marriage is called off since a merger is now impossible. Billy and Hope get married, as do Reno and Evelyn. A cable from the U.S. government fixes Billy's passport problems and declares Moon "harmless". Moon indignantly pockets Oakleigh's check and refuses to return it. Young Wall Street broker Billy Crocker helps his boss Elisha J. Whitney prepare for his trip to London. Eli tells Billy the next morning he is to make a huge sale of a sinking asset. Billy then runs into his friend; evangelist turned night club singer Reno Sweeney who is leaving on the same ship to London. Reno tries to convince Billy to join her, but he refuses and she laments her unrequited love for him ("I Get A Kick Out Of You"). Billy then reveals to Reno he has fallen in love with someone else and she berates him, believing he led her on before sadly reaffirming her feelings for him after he leaves ("I Get A Kick Out Of You - Reprise"). The next morning the crew of the SS American prepare to set sail ("There's No Cure Like Travel") as Reno and the other passengers board. Among them is debutante Hope Harcourt, the subject of Billy's infatuation. She is joined by her wealthy English fiancé Lord Evelyn Oakleigh and her mother Evangeline, who has set her daughter up to be married in order to solve their family's recent financial struggles. Billy comes aboard to give Eli his passport and spots Hope. Upon hearing that she is to be wed, he stays on the ship in order to pursue her. Also sneaking on to the American is Public Enemy No. 13 Moonface Martin, who is disguised as a priest. He is joined by Erma, the promiscuous girlfriend of Public Enemy #1 Snake Eyes Johnson, who is nowhere to be found. Billy inadvertently helps Moonface evade the FBI. Moonface returns the favor by giving Billy Snake Eyes' ticket as the ship leaves the dock ("Bon Voyage"). Later that night, Billy bumps into an apologetic Reno who encourages him to go after his real love. When Billy starts to express insecurities about being with Hope, Reno builds up his confidence while playfully putting herself down, and he returns the favor ("You're The Top"). Billy then scares off a seasick Evelyn so he can court Hope away from him ("So Easy To Love"). Though she returns Billy's feeling, Hope insists on maintaining her duty and marrying Evelyn. Once alone though, she repeats his romantic words ("So Easy To Love - Reprise"). Eli drunkenly sings about his excitement for the trip, reminisces on his days in Yale, and unsuccessfully invites Hope's mother, Evangeline, to spend the night with him ("The Crew Song"). In the next room over, Moonface and Erma are visited by Billy, who hides when the ship's captain comes in and reveals that Billy is believed to be Snake Eyes Johnson. The next morning a quartet of sailors sing about the joy of seeing women as they come ashore ("There'll Always Be a Lady Fair") while Erma steals another seaman's clothes to disguise Billy from the crew and his boss. Reno then encounters her old friend Moonface, shortly after which Evelyn approaches her and reveals himself to be a huge fan. Evelyn invites Reno for tea in his room, which Moonface convinces her to accept so she can seduce Evelyn, which they'll use to blackmail him and break up his engagement. Reno agrees to his plan and they sing about what great friends they are, only to descend into bickering ("Friendship"). The attempted extortion proves to be a failure, with Reno and Evelyn instead finding themselves utterly charmed by each other. Billy and Moonface then try to frame Evelyn as a madman to Evangeline only for Hope to step in and expose Billy's identity. The crew pursues him while Reno reprimands Hope for ignoring her own happiness and chasing away the man she loves.